


I Lost It

by NaleyForever2020



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-04
Updated: 2021-02-07
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:48:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 15,631
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27875601
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NaleyForever2020/pseuds/NaleyForever2020
Summary: Its been a year since Vanessa left is she too late to get her family back
Relationships: Charity Dingle/Vanessa Woodfield
Comments: 6
Kudos: 55





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> also on fanfiction net

**Prologue**

Charity and Vanessa have been broken up now for six months with Vanessa having to commute back and forth to Leeds they just grew apart and they were arguing a lot which wasn’t healthy and it had started affecting their son’s. Vanessa decided the best thing to do was to move to Leeds they couldn’t keep going the way they was.

When Vanessa first left Charity first thought she needed a few days to calm down and then she’d come home and everything would be ok again. But she never did, she knew it must hurt Vanessa being away from the boys they stayed with her every weekend Vanessa didn’t want them to move schools they’re in yeah 9 now they would be having exams soon and neither of them wanted them to suffer.

Noah was in New York for his job and they didn’t want to worry him so they never said anything but Charity was shore he knew her family was never quite about things. The house felt so empty and Charity hated being there on her own so whenever the boys were at Vanessa’s she stayed at the pub Chas and Paddy never minded they knew how much she was hurting.

**Chapter 1**

“Hi ma, what’s for tea” Johnny asked as he came through the door.

“I thought we could order pizza, your brother is going to be face timing us later and I didn’t really feel like cooking” Charity sad as he slumped down on the couch next to her.

“Cool, Moz is out with Sofie, he should be home soon, is it ok if I play my xbox for a bit” Johnny asked as he grabbed the controller.

“Cause you can, so Moses is serious about Sofie then he’s always with her” Charity asked happy for her boy this break up was hard on them.

“Yeah, ma you know how much I love basketball well there’s this camp in London and coach said it would really help my game. But I’ll be away the whole six week holiday I know mum wanted me and Moz in Leeds for half the time with her, but I really wanna do this so I was thinking if I could go” Johnny asked hoping he could go.

“You’ll have to ask you mum too babe, I don’t have an issue with it, I’ll miss you like crazy but I know how much this will mean to you” Charity smiled as she hugged her son.

“Thanks Ma, I’ll ring her later” Johnny smiled as he continued with his game.

Vanessa had, had another long day at work all she wanted to do was go home and have an evening in front of the telly. Her mind often wondered what Charity and the boys were doing she missed them she wished things were different.

“Hi Trace what’s up” Vanessa asked as she answered the phone.

“Nothing much just ringing to see if you’ve come to you senses and come home” Tracy said for what felt like the thousandth time since she left.

“Trace don’t start my job is here. Charity and I grew apart, I’m happy here can you please just try and be happy for me” Vanessa lied she wasn’t happy but there was nothing she could do about that now.

“Your family misses you they need you, you could have continued running the practice with Paddy, none of this makes any sense to just take a job in Leeds” Tracy yelled someone had to talk some sense into her.

“Tracy it’s not just a job this is my career why can’t you just be happy for me I’m not that far away you can visit me whenever you want I never left you Trace” Vanessa cried wishing this conversation would end.

“No you just left the love of your life and your boys, you know what I’m gonna go Emilia will be home from school soon and I don’t want her to see me so mad” Tracy said as she hung up how could her sister be so stupid.

Vanessa felt her heart breaking all over again Tracy was right she was an idiot, how could she have been so stupid she should never have left.

“Hi ma, Johnny” Moses said as he came in the house and dumped his stuff on the floor taking a seat next to his brother.

“So how’s things going with your girlfriend and when do we get to meet her” Charity asked as she handed him a drink.

“It’s going good and you don’t get too no way are you gonna embarrass me” Moses laughed at the face she was giving him.

“I’m you mum it’s my job to embarrass you and hey I’m the cool mum” Charity joked with him.

“Yeah, yeah whatever you say so you gonna order this pizza or what I’m starving” Moses said as she ruffled his hair.

“Hi Trace” Charity said as her sister in law walked through the door.

“Hi Charity boys, so I was thinking in a couple of days I’ll take you both to the cinema Emilia wants to spend some time with you I can’t believe my little girl is 11” Tracy said after her talk with Vanessa she wanted to be with her nephews.

“Sounds good. Ma I’m just gonna go and ring mum can you call me when Noah rings” Johnny said as he got up to go upstairs.

“Ok, I’ll bring you up some pizza when it arrives and Johnny don’t get upset if she says no” Charity said hoping he got the answer he wanted from Vanessa.

“Ok what’s going on” Tracy asked none of this made any sense.

“He want’s to go to Basketball camp for summer it’s no big deal calm down Trace” Charity explained.

“So he told you then, he’s been thinking about it for weeks. He doesn’t want to hurt either of you I told him you’ll both be ok. After everything that happened he’s worried he’s going to make things worse for you he hates seeing you upset” Moses said this break up really affected his little brother.

“Moses I’m sorry if I haven’t been the best mum to you and your brother. I know I’ve been upset the last six months but I’ll be ok I don’t want my break up to affect you and your brother” Charity cried feeling bad she thought she hid her pain well.

“Ma we love you, we don’t like to see you cry, and ma you’re an amazing mum, your always here for us so please don’t blame yourself life just happens” Moses said as he hugged his mum.

“Moses can I speak to your mum for a minute” Tracy asked she didn’t want to have this conversation with her nephew there.

“What’s up Trace” Charity asked as Moses went upstairs. 

“Have you spoken to Vanessa, she misses you” Tracy asked she hated seeing her so upset.

“Please don’t Trace, I can’t hear this right now” Charity cried this was just too much in one day.

“Charity it’s been six months you need to talk about it, you can’t even say her name it’s not healthy. I know she left you, I still don’t know why she did but either talk to her or move on because I don’t want to see you hurting anymore” Tracy said as she tried to talk some sense into her.

“Trace please just leave it” Charity said grateful the pizza arrived at this moment she didn’t want to have this conversation.

“Ok, ok I’ll go, I’ll come by tomorrow” Tracy said as she left.

“This is bullshit, why can’t I go, Ma said it’s ok, I love basketball” Johnny yelled at his mum how could she say no.

“Johnny I want to see you, you’re still young you can’t go to London on your own” Vanessa sighed hating to hear her son so angry.

“Mum I’m not a little kid I’m fourteen, I want to do this. You fucking left us for what, and now you think you can tell me what to do go to hell” Johnny yelled as he hung up the phone.

“Johnny ring your mum back right now and apologise” Charity said as she herd him yelling at his mum this wasn’t her sweet boy he would never behave like that.

“Why should I she doesn’t care about us she left ma, she left us and now she tries to act like she cares. I’m going to that camp I don’t care what she says.

“Johnny your mum loves you, it was me she left not you and your brother. Please call her I don’t want her to hurt and hearing them words from you will devastate her” Charity said she’d hate to have them cold words said to her.

“Ok, ma I’ll call her back” Johnny sighed as she left the room to give him some space.

“Oh and when you’ve finished Pizza’s here” Charity said as she went to get Moses.

“Hi mum look I’m sorry for the way I spoke to you, but I’m going to camp” Johnny said no way was he not going.

“I’ll discuss this with Charity and thank you for apologising I never meant to make you angry” Vanessa said as she wiped her tears she hated her son being in pain.

“Whatever mum I gotta go dinners ready I’ll see you in a few days” Johnny said as he hung up the phone.

It’s been a long night Vanessa couldn’t get her conversation with Johnny out of her head she felt like her son hated her, it made her feel like the worst person in the world. She didn’t want her son to hurt. He was still so young he couldn’t go to London on his own.

“Hi” Vanessa choked out not expecting Charity to answer she hasn’t spoken to her since she left.

“I’ll just get one of the boys” Charity broke out after moments of silence.

“Charity will you talk to me please” Vanessa cried it broke her heart hearing the pain in her voice it felt like a lifetime since they last spoke.

“I, I can’t do this, I have to go” Charity cried as she hung up the phone it hurt too much she was her forever and she just broke that broke her.

“Mama don’t cry” Johnny said as he wrapped his arms around her.

“It’s ok I’ll be ok” Charity cried as he held her.

“No Ma it’s not ok, I hate mum for hurting you” Johnny said as he wiped some of her tears.

“I don’t want you to hate her, she loves you, she just doesn’t love me. I don’t want you worrying about me I’ll be ok. I have you and your brother you are my priority” Charity said not wanting her kids to see her in pain.

“Mum doesn’t deserve you not anymore so promise me you won’t let her hurt you again” Johnny said he didn’t want to see her cry anymore he hated seeing her so hurt.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

Vanessa barely slept after her non conversation with Charity and the angry words her son said to her she had to get to work soon she couldn’t fall apart again.

Tracy had to do something she had to go and see her sister talk some sense into her. Her family needed her she couldn’t watch them hurting anymore. She called Charity and told her she’d be over in the evening hopefully with her sister with her.

After Tracy cancelled there morning Charity decided to go into town and get some bits she was going to cook a family meal just her and the boys they needed it after yesterday. She couldn’t explain why she can’t talk to Vanessa it just hurts hearing her voice she’s never missed anyone as much as she misses her. She knows at some point she’s going to have to speak to her but right now she just can’t it’s still to raw.

“Vanessa are you ok you seem lost” Amy asked as they sat down for lunch.

“Sorry my heads all over the place. I had an argument with my son last night” Vanessa said feeling bad for ignoring her.

“I’m here if you ever want to talk, it must be hard to be away from them” Amy said as she placed her hand on Vanessa’s hand to offer her support.

“Johnny hates me, he was so angry, I know he loves basketball but he’s too young to go away without me and Charity. He need’s a guardian I won’t let him go to London on his own” Vanessa cried it felt nice to talk to someone.

“Maybe you should talk to him explain that to him and that he can go when he’s older” Amy said trying to help.

Tracy couldn’t believe what she was seeing Charity deserves better here was Vanessa in a public place with another woman how could she do this. Tracy couldn’t speak to her now she was to angry so she turned around and headed back to her car. How was she going to explain this to Charity this was going to destroy her.

When Charity arrived home she got started on dinner she wasn’t the best cook but she could cook a mean spagbol she bought some garlic bread to go with it. She tried to get hold of Tracy to invite her, Nate and Emilia but she couldn’t get hold of her. Ryan was in Birmingham with work so it was just going to be the three of them.

“Hi mum hope you’re doing ok, Jack say’s hello, I’m just wondering when you’ll be coming up to Scotland we miss you and the boys, anyway I’ll call you later love you” Debbie left a message on the answering machine.

Charity thought about ringing her back but she’ll wait till later this evening when the kids are in bed it was time for her to let Debbie know what’s going on she couldn’t keep them in the dark anymore.

“Hi Trace, what’s the matter” Charity asked as she saw how upset she was.

“I, I went to see Vanessa, that’s why I cancelled earlier” Tracy cried how was she going to tell her this was too much.

“Is she ok, what’s the matter with her” Charity asked she had to be ok she just had to she should have just spoken to her yesterday.

“She’s ok it’s not that, I saw her with another woman, I’m so sorry” Tracy cried she had to tell her she couldn’t keep this from her she was like a sister and she’s been there for her through the years.

“She’s seeing someone” Charity couldn’t quite believe the words she was saying how could she do that. They were still married didn’t their vows mean anything she didn’t think her heart could break anymore than it already had but she was wrong.

“I’m so sorry Charity, I think it’s time for you to move on. My sister doesn’t deserve you after all you’ve been through and she can just do this, it’s not right to you or the boys” Tracy cried as she hugged her how was they going to get through this.

“I need to go and lie down can you finish the diner for me” Charity asked as she got up this was too much she needed to clear her head.

“Ok I can do that and don’t worry I spoke to Nate he can cope with our daughter for one night I’m going to be here for you and the boys” Tracy said as she went to finish the food charity was preparing.

When Vanessa got home she thought about ringing Charity but after what happened yesterday she thought not, she hated hearing the pain she was going through because of her. After speaking to Amy she decided Johnny could go she spoke to Sarah who was currently working that way and she said she’d look out for him. She knew if she rang Johnny he wouldn’t answer so she left a text message saying he could go. She smiled when she got a text back, “thanks mum, I’ll ring you later” things were going to be ok she could feel it.

“Hi Tracy where’s mum” Moses asked as he and Johnny came through the door.

“She’s gone to have a lie down, diner should be ready soon, how was school” Tracy asked.

“Is ma ok” Johnny asked she was really upset last night.

“She will be, boys please don’t worry, your mum is strong she’ll get through this” Tracy said as she hugged them.

Charity knew what she had to do she couldn’t keep doing this to her son’s it was time to move on she had to pull herself together because she couldn’t keep feeling like this it was time to start living her life again.


	3. chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

It’s been a couple of days now and she still hadn’t heard from any of her kids or her sister she couldn’t understand it apart from a text here and there just silence, Charity still wouldn’t answer her calls. Apart from working all the time just to keep her from missing them every second of the day she had nothing. Her career was the best it’s ever been she was running the biggest firm in Yorkshire she should be the happiest but she’s never felt more miserable.

When Vanessa arrived home there was a large brown envelope addressed to her she couldn’t think of what it was she wasn’t behind in bills and she’s never been more financially secure. She had a feeling this wasn’t good so she sat down to open it.

Vanessa couldn’t believe what she was seeing divorce papers how could she want a divorce, then she saw a letter inside and Charity’s wedding ring. Vanessa couldn’t stop the tears from coming now her heart shattered into a million pieces.

**_Vanessa I’ve spent most of the night trying to write this, this is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to say. When you left I thought you’d come back I know things were tough when you took the job we barely saw each other and I know I should have made things easier and I’m sorry for that. I held on to us for so long you were my world I couldn’t live without you._ **

**_We had twelve great years together and I want you to know I’ve never been happier than when I was with you and our boys. I’m sorry I wasn’t enough, I’m sorry if I never showed you every day how much you mean to me. You are still the love of my life tiny blonde rocket woman but I know now it’s over between us I see that now. I want you to be happy even if it’s not with me._ **

**_I need to move on and I can’t do that if your still my wife, I tried to ring you but I just couldn’t it hurts me hearing your voice. We can keep the same arrangement with the kids, don’t worry I won’t say anything about you moving on, you can tell them in your own time. I just want you to be happy Ness so please can you do that for me it hurts me to see you in pain._ **

**_Please don’t fight this I deserve some closure, I deserve to be happy too. Even though this is shattering my heart into a million pieces, I have to do this I have to set you free. If you need to discuss the kids can you please call trace I just need some time._ **

**_I forgive you, I just want you to know that. I don’t blame you for leaving maybe if I was enough you wouldn’t have left I’ve sort of rambled on here sorry about that I love you I always will goodbye Vanessa._ **

Vanessa couldn’t believe what she had done she broke the love of her life and now it was really over. How could she have been so stupid, how could she put her career before her family she had to make this right because she couldn’t live without Charity she had to stop this, she had to fight for them, this isn’t how her marriage is going to end.

Charity had been working behind the bar all day, she couldn’t get Vanessa out of her head she must have received the divorce papers by now she still couldn’t believe it was really over this was the hardest thing she’s ever been through nothing comes close to the pain of losing Vanessa. After speaking to Debbie and explaining what was going on it was Debbie who made her see she couldn’t keep living like this, even though she was angry her mum kept this from her she wanted her mum to be happy even if it meant giving up on Vanessa.

“Hi Charity, you look like you need a drink” Marlon said as he walked through the back of the pub and seen her broken again sitting at the table.

“Thanks Marlon I’ll be ok I just need a minute” Charity sighed as he placed a drink down on the table.

“You know when my wife left I was a mess, I had to let it all go, the feeling that I wasn’t good enough for her, I hated the fact that she chose to leave that I wasn’t enough for her to stay, but I moved on Charity and you will to. I’m not saying this to hurt you I just don’t like to see you like this you need to move on.

“I know, thanks Marlon and hey does it ever stop hurting” Charity asked as she took the shot of whiskey.

“Yeah it does eventually, you’ll get through this and I’m here if you ever want to talk” Marlon said as he left giving her time to think he could handle the bar until Chas came back.

Charity needed to head home the boys will be back from the cinema soon and she wanted to spend some time with them before they went to Vanessa’s for the weekend.

Vanessa knew what she had to do, she rang head office and quit her job she knew Paddy would hire her back not that she needed the money right now she’d made enough by working here for the last year she wasn’t struggling for cash she had enough money to send both her boys to University. She had to go home her life was never here she became all about her career that she lost sight of the fact that without her family she had nothing she should have never have listened to her mum.

When Charity arrived home the boys were playing on their games console they didn’t even notice her walk through the door. It was nice seeing them happy.

“Hi ma we bought back some Chinese take away it’s in the microwave” Moses said as he noticed his mum standing in the kitchen.

“Thanks babe, did you enjoy your evening with Trace and Emilia” Charity asked it was good for them to have a night away from all this mess.

“Yeah it was good” Moses said as he paused the game.

“Ma, mum said I can go to the camp she mentioned it the other day, in my excitement I forgot to mention it” Johnny smiled.

“That’s good babe I’m happy for you, I’ll miss you though. I spoke to your brother earlier and he’s invited me to New York for a few weeks so I can go and clear my head Tracy said she’ll speak to your mum about you staying with Trace during the week. If you don’t want me to go I won’t I would never leave you, I just need to get away not from you boys please don’t think that. I need to sort myself out I need to make me, me again if that makes sense” Charity tried explaining she doesn’t want them to feel like she abandoned them.

“It’s ok ma we know you need to get away with everything that’s happened, we want you to be happy” Johnny said as he hugged his mum.

“It’s good with me to ma can you bring us back some clothes I wanna look fly for the new year” Moses laughed as he hugged his mum.

“Oh yeah I forgot about that can you get me some basketball stuff I’ll what’s app Noah somethings I want” Johnny said as he took out his phone.

“I guess I can do that I love you so much, what did I ever do to deserve you two” Charity smiled she was a lucky woman to have such good kids.

“Love you too ma, well we best be off to bed got school in the morning and I need to ring Sofie” Moses said as he dragged his brother upstairs.

After cleaning up the kitchen, Charity decided to watch some TV she didn’t feel tired and thought a movie would help her relax. A few minutes in the doorbell rang who could that be at this time of night.

“I want to come home Charity” Vanessa said after moments of silence.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

Charity didn’t know what to say she couldn’t believe Vanessa was here standing in front of her. “Why, why now” Charity broke out trying to stop the tears from forming.

“I’m so sorry, I never meant to hurt you, please can we just talk” Vanessa asked as tears streamed down her face.

“Come in” Charity cried not wanting the neighbours to see and being centre of the gossip again.

“Are the boys in bed” Vanessa asked as she stood up by the couch in the front room.

“Yeah it’s gone midnight of course there in bed. What are you doing here anyway shouldn’t you be off enjoying your new life in Leeds” Charity yelled as she stood opposite the love of her life.

“I was miserable, I missed you so much. I’m sorry I put my career before us and the boys, I’m sorry if I ever made you feel like you’re not my whole world. Not a day went by where my heart wasn’t here with you” Vanessa cried.

“Cut the crap, you left, you did this, I would have done anything for you. You could have continued to commute, or even just stayed working with Paddy, but you didn’t I wasn’t enough for you to stay. You broke me but I’m moving on I have to” Charity cried she wanted to be with her more than anything but right now she just couldn’t.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. I thought I was doing what was best for my family I was stupid to put my career before my family, I know that now I meant what I said I want to come home. We don’t need to divorce we can work this out, please don’t make the mistake I did by giving up on us” Vanessa cried she needed Charity like she needed air.

“I’m just finishing what you started, your girlfriend can’t be happy you’re here or did you leave her an all” Charity yelled.

“Girlfriend what are you talking about” Vanessa asked confused.

“I knew it, I knew it was your fault. I hate you how could you mum, how could you do this to ma” Johnny yelled as he came down the stairs he heard yelling and it woke him up.

“Johnny I don’t know what you heard, but please can you just listen” Vanessa cried as she saw the pain in her little boy.

“Go to hell, ma deserves better than you, so do me and Moz. Go back to Leeds we don’t need you here I never want to see you again” Johnny yelled as he stormed out he couldn’t believe his parents were getting divorced and his mum had a new girlfriend how could she do that he’s never felt so angry.

“He didn’t mean that he’s just hurting,” Charity said knowing that must have hurt to hear those words from your kids.

“I’ve got to go after him explain” Vanessa cried she truly lost everything.

“Don’t I’ll go, he won’t want to talk to you, he needs to calm down” Charity said as she went after her son she didn’t like leaving Vanessa so broken but her son needed her.

“I’m so sorry Ma, I hate her, how could she do this” Johnny cried as she held him.

“It’s ok Johnny I’ll be ok, but please don’t hate your mum she loves you. It’s me she left not you Johnny bob and hearing those words from you must have broken her. I know you didn’t mean those words I know you’re angry and hurt but you can’t speak to her like that she still your mum” Charity said as she wiped the tears from his face.

“Your my mum too and she hurt you, I don’t like to see you hurt” Johnny said hating what was going on.

“Johnny please can you come back home and just say sorry it will mean a lot to your mum and I need to finish talking to her we have so much to discuss about what is going to happen” Charity said as she kissed his cheek.

“Yeah ok come on and ma please don’t let her hurt you again” Johnny said as they walked back home.

With all the yelling Moses woke up and couldn’t believe his mum was home it hurt to see her cry “mum your home” Moses said as he hugged her.

“I’ve missed you at least I haven’t lost you” Vanessa cried as he held her son.

“They don’t hate you mum, they’re just hurting” Moses said not wanting his mum to be upset.

“I’m sorry, ma I’m going to bed” Johnny said as he came through the door and headed upstairs.

“Hey Moz I need to speak to your mum, I’ll explain everything in the morning” Charity said she needed to talk to Vanessa they needed to sort things out.

“Ok night, will you be here in the morning mum we could grab some breakfast before school” Moses asked as he got up.

“Sounds perfect” Vanessa smiled as he hugged her before retreating upstairs.

“Ness I spoke to Johnny he loves you he does he’s just hurting” Charity sighed not wanting her to think their son hated her.

“I know he does it’s just going to take time for him to forgive me. Charity I’m not with someone else it was never about that” Vanessa said it’s been racking her brain how could Charity think she was with someone else.

“Don’t ok Tracy saw you, it’s ok you don’t need to lie to me. You’ve moved on its time for me to as well, look it’s late you can stay in Noah’s room if you want” Charity sighed it still hurt being this near to her and not being hers anymore.

“I don’t know what crazy things Tracy been telling you but I swear I’m not seeing anyone. I love you I don’t want anyone else. My life is here with you and the boys. I was stupid to move to Leeds I wanted you to come after me tell me we could make this work but I never heard from you I was miserable all I did was work and see the boys. I missed my best friend. I know I hurt you and I’m going to spend the rest of my life showing you how much you mean to me” Vanessa cried she needed her wife back.

“You can’t say that, you’re the one who left, I would have done anything for you. I know I drove you away I know I wasn’t enough for you” Charity cried she couldn’t stop the tears now.

“Of course your enough I love you, can you please give me another chance we can make this work I know we can because I’m never losing you again” Vanessa said as she went to wrap Charity in her arms.

“Please don’t, I need space. I’m leaving for New York tomorrow night I need to see my son and he thought it be a good idea to clear my head” Charity said as she moved away from the love of her life this was the worst pain she’s ever felt.

“You’re leaving, what about the boys” Vanessa said she couldn’t let her leave like she did.

“I’m going for a few weeks, I’m not abandoning them, I don’t need to justify myself I’m going to bed” Charity said as she walked away she didn’t want to have another row and that’s where the conversation was heading.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

Vanessa’s been back home a couple of days now she was still sleeping in Noah’s old room she couldn’t bring herself to sleep in their room not without Charity it would hurt too much. Charity left for New York last night she never saw her after their talk the night before she really needed to make things right Johnny still barely spoke to her and she realised the hurt she’s caused all her family.

“Hi Vee what you doing here” Tracy asked not expecting to see her sister.

“Trace why did you tell Charity I was seeing someone” Vanessa asked she spent all of yesterday thinking about it why would her sister do that.

“I saw you with some woman you looked friendly I had to say something, Charity was a mess she couldn’t even here your name without breaking down. She needed to move on, you had” Tracy said her sister made this mess not her.

“I was not seeing some woman I don’t know what your talking about, I know I messed up by leaving, I was hurting too I missed her more than anything, I was miserable. I never thought it was over she’s my wife and I love her so much. I’ve made the biggest mistake of my life and now because you told her I have someone Charity hates me, my son hate’s me. Your supposed to be my sister you should have come and spoke to me” Vanessa cried.

“This isn’t my fault Vee you left them, I never made you do that, I’ve been here looking out for your boys and helping Charity. You claim to love her but you destroyed her, you know she sleeps at the pub every weekend because she can’t face being in the house on her own. She drank so much I thought she was going to drink herself to death. She never showed it in front of the boys she was always sober around them. Why did you leave Vee, why did you give up on your marriage” Tracy asked she still couldn’t understand it they were so loved up.

“I was stupid ok Trace, I was always working and going back and forth to Leeds was hard, we were arguing a lot. I spoke to my mum and she said it be best to have some space from Charity and concentrate on my career. I was hoping Charity would come after me and tell me we could make this work, I could continue to commute and make this marriage work. She never came Trace and you know how stubborn I can be I thought it be better to just stay in Leeds. I made the biggest mistake of my life and now Charity wants a divorce and I’ve really lost her now” Vanessa cried she didn’t know how she was going to get her family back but she had too.

“Vee, Charity’s just hurting right now, but she’ll forgive you she loves you, it’s just going to take time. I’ll help you ok and no more listening to your mum, she’s barely in your life Vee she doesn’t know the life you lead. You being so successful just means she has more to brag about with her friends. She’s seen Johnny twice in his whole life she’s not the best person for advice” Tracy said as she hugged her sister.

“I know I was stupid, thanks Trace, well I better go I’ve got to cook diner for the boys” Vanessa said hopefully things will start to get easier with Johnny. 

Charity’s been in New York for a day now Noah’s apartment was nice and it was amazing to see her son after so long. Thankfully he never mentioned what was going on she really didn’t want to talk about her failed marriage. While Noah was at work it gave her time to see the sites and do some shopping the boys had given her a long list of things they wanted.

New York was an amazing place there was so much to see and do, she wished the boys were with her they would have loved it but they had school and with Vanessa being back it gave them sometime with their mum. She knew the split was hard on them too and she wanted them to be happy again. After all the shopping she got a taxi back to the apartment Noah explained there was no point driving in New York there’s way to many cars its way worse than it is in London.

“Hi mum how was your day” Noah asked as she came through the door.

“It was good there’s so much to see, I bought Johnny and Moses the stuff they wanted cost me a bloody fortune” Charity said as she sat down.

“Mum you should have waited I could have taken us to Jersey where the outlets are and also Walmart” Noah said he knew it was quite expensive in the city.

“It’s ok babe we can still do that you know I love to shop” Charity smiled it would be nice to spend the day with her son.

“Ok I’ve taken a few days off so we can go and see some sites. I was thinking tonight we could go out there’s this bar I go to a couple of blocks from here, there’s live music I thought it be fun” Noah suggested it would be nice to see his mum have some fun he knew this break up was hard on her.

“Sounds good I’m just going to have a shower and get ready, maybe you can order some food I’m starving” Charity said as she got up.

“I was thinking we could head to Gray's Papaya it’s the best hot dog place in the city it’s famous” Noah said he loved the food there.

When they arrived at the bar Noah ordered his mum a hurricane cocktail, which was a famous drink from New Orleans he knew she’d like it. It was so good to see his mum he hates the fact she’s hurting and he thinks a night on the town will be good for her he picked a quite bar so they could talk for a while then they could head to livelier places.

“This is nice, thanks Noah” Charity said as she drank some of the cocktail he got her.

“Mum what happened with you and Vanessa, I am your happy you’re here I’ve missed you, I couldn’t believe it when you told me you’d split up. It doesn’t make sense” Noah asked.

“Noah I already told you she left me and moved on, I just want to forget about it. I need to move on I don’t want to hurt anymore” Charity sighed she didn’t want to have this conversation right now.

“Ok, I won’t mention yet. I don’t like to see you hurting mum I want you to have a good time” Noah said as he hugged her.

“Thank you lets have some fun I need it” Charity said as they got up it was time to experience the New York night life and forget about Vanessa.

It was gone 8pm and Johnny still wasn’t home she was starting to get worried he wasn’t answering his phone and she didn’t want to disturb Moses on his date and ruin his night.

“Hey, I’m going upstairs” Johnny said as he came through the door still not ready to talk to his mum.

“Johnny where have you been I’ve been so worried” Vanessa cried as he started to walk upstairs.

“Oh now you care, that’s great. I was at Basketball training we’ve got a big game coming up in a few days, I’ve got a new game I wanna play on my xbox can we not have this conversation” Johnny said as he started to head upstairs.

“Can you talk to me please, you’re my son I love you. I hate that I’ve hurt you can you please forgive me” Vanessa cried pleading with him he was her baby.

“I don’t hate you mum I just hate what you did” Johnny said as he turned to look at her she was broken and it killed him he hated seeing her like this.

“I was stupid I know that I lost my family, I lost the love of my life but I promise you I was never with anyone else I love Charity she’s my wife. I don’t want anyone else I’m going to do everything I can to get my family back, because I can’t live without you” Vanessa said with total conviction she wasn’t going to mess this up again.

“Mum I’m sorry if I hurt you, I do love you, I love Ma too and it killed me the pain she was in, but I’ll help you mum I’ll help you get Ma back” Johnny said as he hugged his mum he felt bad for all the things he said to her.

“I’ve missed you” Vanessa cried as he held her.

“Mum what about your job will you be commuting like you was before” Johnny asked not wanting there to be issues again.

“I quit, I should never have taken the job in the first place I spoke to Paddy I’m going to invest back in the practice this is my home this is where my life is I hated being away and I’m never leaving again” Vanessa said she had to put her family first.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

Vanessa thought it be a good idea to stay with Tracy with Charity being home any day she knew she couldn’t continue staying at their house Charity wouldn’t want her there not after everything that’s happened.

Charity thought about telling Vanessa she was back but since she arrived home last night it still hurt to even think about her this was their home. When she spoke to Johnny he told her mum’s at Tracy’s which she was thankful for. She expected Vanessa to go back to Leeds but she hadn’t, she knew they needed to talk but not right now.

“Morning Ma, do you want a cuppa” Johnny asked as he came in the front room.

“Ta, Johnny bobs can we keep the fact I came back early to yourself I really just need some time before I see anyone” Charity said she just wasn’t ready yet.

“Will do, Moz should be home from Ross’s in a few days he might say something though Ma” Johnny said as he put the kettle on.

“That’s ok I should be able to in a day or too, how is your mum” Charity asked she was happy they worked things out she didn’t want Johnny to hate his mum.

“She’s sad, I spoke to her Ma she isn’t seeing anyone. I know she hurt you but you’ll be ok eventually it’s just going to take time” Johnny said as he handed her the cup of tea.

Charity wanted to say something but she didn’t want to hurt him, she’s still to hurt this was the worst pain she’s ever felt but things were over too much has happened.

Vanessa was back working with Paddy and Rhona, it felt just like old times. It was like she never left.

“So Ness how’s thing going with Charity have you spoke to her while she’s been away” Rhona asked as they were eating lunch.

“There not good she won’t talk to me still, at least Johnny has forgiven me I really messed up Rhona I should never have listened to my mum. I’m sorry for leaving you and Paddy in the lurch too I should never have taken that job even if it was the biggest achievement of my career. I lost my wife over that stupid job and I almost lost my boys I was an idiot” Vanessa cried it was the biggest mistake of her life.

“Ness we didn’t blame you for leaving there really wasn’t much going on here, this was your career. I just think you handled it wrong, why did you have to move to Leeds, you didn’t need to do that Ness, Charity will forgive you she loves you it’s just going to take time. If you’d have come home sooner I think she’d have forgiven you right away. Charity felt bad for how she handled things she blamed herself for pushing you away. When she found out you were with someone else it killed her she knew then it was over” Rhona said not wanting to hurt her friend but she needed to know.

“I wasn’t with anyone else that’s my sister jumping to conclusions. I never left Charity because I stopped loving her, I love her more than I’ve ever loved anyone she’s my wife I just needed to see if I could work for a big company I should have just continued to commute. We were arguing all the time I was never home I thought it be easier for me to just live in Leeds I expected Charity to come after me tell me we could make it work she never did Rhona all she did was ignore me. I missed her so much it was killing me being away from her” Vanessa cried as Rhona hugged her.

“Hi you ok Ness, does this have something to do with Charity being back” Paddy asked as he saw her crying.

“Charity’s home” Vanessa asked she was home early.

“Yeah she was having a cuppa with Chas, I thought you knew that’s why your upset” Paddy wished he hadn’t said anything now he was always putting his foot init.

“No, no I didn’t know. I’m gonna go I’ll see you tomorrow” Vanessa cried as she grabbed her bag.

“I’m so sorry Ness I thought you knew” Paddy said as she left he felt really bad he hated seeing her upset.

After walking around the village for the last couple of hours trying to figure out what she needs to do, how was she going to get her family back Vanessa decided to just go home and speak to Charity they needed to sort something out they couldn’t keep going on like this.

“Hi Ness what, what you doing here” Charity asked as she opened the door not expecting to see her.

“Charity why didn’t you tell me you were home” Vanessa asked still hurt by what’s happening.

“I didn’t even know you were still going to be here, your life is in Leeds now why would you want to be in a small town keeping you from your career” Charity said as turned away from Vanessa she couldn’t let her see how upset she was again.

“I told you I’m back for good, I’m never leaving again, my life is here, can you look at me please” Vanessa asked as tears streamed down her face.

“Well if you came back for me your too late, we’re done” Charity said as she started walking upstairs.

“Why are you being like this Charity I love you it hurt hearing your back from Paddy what were you going to do just never see me again we have kids. You’ll have to face me sooner or later, you’re still my wife we can’t keep going on like this” Vanessa yelled.

“We’re not together anymore I can do what I like, you’re the one that left me then you decide you want to come back and I’m what just supposed to forgive you and take you back. Life doesn’t work like that. I won’t be your back up plan anymore so go, leave I don’t want you here, I need to move on just like you did” Charity said as she turned to look at Vanessa it hurt seeing her so broken, but too much had been said and done for her to change her mind.

“I never moved on, your it for me this is ridiculous you acting like I had an affair. I took a job that is all yes I shouldn’t have left I know that now but there wasn’t one day that I was away where my heart wasn’t here with you and the boys. Why are you hurting me like this” Vanessa asked she couldn’t believe this was the same woman she married had she broken her so much she became cruel.

“I’m hurting you are you kidding me right now. You were my wife we had kids and you just left you did this to us not me” Charity yelled as she slammed her bedroom door behind her.

Vanessa knew at this point she needed to leave there was no talking to Charity when she was being like this.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

After sitting in her room the words Charity said to Vanessa going around in her head she felt so bad about the way she spoke to her she didn’t deserve that Charity knew she needed to apologise.

“Hey Ness can we talk” Charity asked as she saw Vanessa sitting on the swings she looked so hurt and it killed her.

“Yeah, I’m sorry about earlier I overreacted” Vanessa cried as Charity sat in the swing next to her.

“No I’m sorry I should have told you I was back in town. I’ve been avoiding you because I’m still angry, Ness about everything, I don’t see that changing anytime soon. I know we’ve got somethings to work out with the boys and we will but right now I can’t be around you it just hurts too much” Charity cried not wanting to hurt her but she needed the truth.

“”I love you, I want to be your wife again I want us to be a family again I know I hurt you and it kills me, but please can you give me another chance I swear to you I’m never leaving again” Vanessa said as she knelt in front of Charity.

“Don’t Ness, I meant what I said in the letter I need to move on I need to be happy again. Losing you nearly killed me I’ve never been so broken. I love you I always will but I just can’t be with you not anymore I never thought you could ever hurt me and you did you hurt me more than anyone ever has. I’m not saying this to hurt you I hate hurting you but I just can’t see things being right with us again” Charity cried they were both so broken she wished they could go back to how they was but she doesn’t trust her not anymore.

“Charity please don’t do this things will be different now I can’t live without you” Vanessa cried she couldn’t lose her not again.

“Ness we’ll keep the same schedule for the boys and I’ll try to be around you, I would like us to eventually be friends at least I just need some time” Charity said as she got up to leave her heart was broken and she didn’t think it would ever heal.

Vanessa really does not know what to do anymore how could she have screwed up so bad she knew she had to stay and make things right she couldn’t run again she couldn’t give up on her family again.

“Hi mum, I’ve got a game later if you want to come see me play” Johnny said as he saw his mum sitting on the swings.

“I’d love too, thank you” Vanessa smiled as she wiped her eyes she didn’t want him to see her upset.

“You ok mum” Johnny asked as he sat beside her.

“Not really no but I will be, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you play I always thought you’d play football or rugby” Vanessa asked he always loved them.

“Yeah me too I just saw a flyer for basketball try outs in Hotten and thought I’d give it a go and I loved it, it helps I’m tall. Moses is good at rugby Ma sometimes goes to see him play well she did before she attacked the referee. It was so funny a kid tackled Moz when he didn’t have the ball and he got hurt I’ve never seen Ma so mad she charged over to the ref demanding he kick the boy out of the game for hurting her boy. Moz was mortified I just couldn’t stop laughing, I honestly thought she was going to hit him. Moz don’t tell her he’s playing now. Thankfully basketball not like Rugby Ma comes to most games and no incidents yet” Johnny smiled.

“That’s sounds so much like Charity I would love to have been there to see that, she’d never let anyone hurt you boys. Will she be at the game tonight I wouldn’t want to course drama” Vanessa sighed things were not good right now with Charity.

“Ma didn’t say whether she was coming or not, mum I want you there, you and ma will be fine I saw you talking before ma loves you it’s just going to take time for her to trust you again you really hurt her by leaving” Johnny said as he hugged his mum he didn’t like to see her upset.

“Then I’ll be there, I’m going to do everything for Charity to forgive me and want to be with me again. Those look new” Vanessa asked as she pointed at his new trainers.

“Yeah ma bought them when she was in New York I asked her for a few pairs of Jordan’s and she got me the same sneakers Lebron James used to wear, I’ll be wearing them at the game later. Ma must have spent a fortune I have enough training gear to last years as well. Would you like to come to the house I can show you everything, Moz is back from Ross’s in a couple of days if you want we can go out do something I wanna spend more time with you mum” Johnny said even though he was still angry at what she did he missed spending time with her.

“I’d love that, thank you for letting me back in your life, I really don’t deserve you” Vanessa said as she walked with her son towards her old house.

“Mum I forgive you, I know I’ve been hard on you and I’m sorry about that I was just hurt and it killed me seeing Ma so hurt. I meant what I said the other day I’ll help you with Ma if you need me too” Johnny smiled.

“Thank you, but I need to do this on my own, so what times your game” Vanessa smiled she was so happy to have her son back.

“7 o’clock, do you want a cuppa” Johnny asked as he opened the door.

“Yes please, are you sure this is ok I don’t want Charity to be angry” Vanessa asked as she took a seat.

“Ma will be fine with it, she’s at work if she’s coming to my game she normally meets me there from the pub” Johnny said as he put the kettle on.

It felt so nice to spend the afternoon with Johnny it felt just like old times he’s grown so much she was so proud of her son he was a good kid.

“Mum I got to go, or my coach will bench me but I’ll see you there ok” Johnny said as he grabbed his bag.

“Ok have fun, I’ll see you there I’m going to go see Tracy” Vanessa said as she walked out with Johnny.

Charity couldn’t wait to leave her shift Johnny’s game was starting soon she always made sure to arrange her shifts around his games. Chas was still ribbing her for taking time off when it wasn’t for her but she didn’t care Johnny was her son and always wanted to be there to support him.

“You off then” Chas asked noticing the time.

“Yeah I’ll see you tomorrow, thanks Chas for earlier” Charity said as she grabbed her coat.

“Any time kid, now don’t go hitting the ref you don’t want to be banned from Johnny’s games too” Chas laughed as Charity gave her the finger.

Charity was surprised to see Vanessa at Johnny’s game she didn’t think she’d ever seen him play even though she knew it be difficult she decided to sit next to her Chas was right they needed to become friends because they have kids who need them to be civil.

“Hi Charity, I hope you don’t mind me coming Johnny asked” Vanessa said as Charity sat down.

“Hi Ness I’m happy you’re here, Johnny will be too, he’s a really good player not that I know much about the game” Charity smiled.

“Johnny told me it’s a none contact sport so you won’t attack the ref” Vanessa laughed.

“Ha ha very funny so he told you what happened at the rugby, well the guy should have been doing his job you’re not allowed to just hurt people, that lad could have really hurt my boy” Charity said it still pissed her off she’s been banned.

“Charity you do now you can tackle people in Rugby” Vanessa smiled at the face she was giving her.

“I know that but Moses didn’t even have the ball he deliberately attacked him because Moses was the best player, I wanted to hit him for hurting my boy” Charity said as Johnny’s team entered the court.

“I think it’s great you defended Moses I wish I was there to see it, so what position does Johnny play not that I know about Basketball I’m more into football” Vanessa asked she noticed he was wearing the 23 jersey.

“Oh he’s a small forward, he used to play point guard, but with his height he changed position. I think that’s why he chose 23 after the two greatest players Jordan and Lebron that why he wanted there sneakers. You learn a lot when basketball is mostly what he talks about” Charity smiled as he waved at them.

“You’re a really good mum Charity, I just wanted to tell you that, you know everything about the boys you come and support them I’m so happy my boys have you” Vanessa smiled Charity never gave herself enough credited she was an amazing mum.

“I love them Ness I just want the best for them, but thank you it’s nice to hear. So how is it back working with Paddy and Rhona” Charity asked.

“It’s good Paddy is thinking of retiring so I may take over running the practise” Vanessa smiled as Johnny hit a hard shot.

“I know Johnny’s good that’s called a 3 point shot. The highest you can score unless you get an and 1 but that’s only if you’re fouled, I know I know a lot more than what I said” Charity laughed at the face Vanessa was giving her.

“After the game we can grab some dinner with Johnny if you want to” Vanessa asked hoping she said yes.

“I’d like that, I’m starving” Charity smiled this felt nice she didn’t want there to be any weirdness around Vanessa they didn’t need to be together to be friends.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

Charity had a good night last night was nice to spend time with Vanessa and Johnny just like old times before everything went wrong.

“Good night you look happy” Chas asked as she noticed her cousin smiling.

“Yeah Johnny’s team won and Vanessa and I talked we’ve decided to be friends was a nice evening” Charity smiled as she continued her crossword.

“You and Vanessa friends yeah that’s gonna work you still love her Charity and I know she’d do anything to get back with you” Chas said not wanting them to hurt again.

“I’ll always love her Chas, doesn’t mean we need to be together, I’m not ready to forgive her or if I’ll ever be ready. But I don’t want to lose her from my life and I think it would be good for us to try and be friends no it may not work out but I’m going to try” Charity said as she poured herself a drink. 

“Ok just be careful I don’t want to see you hurting again. Anyway I was thinking in a couple of days we could go on a night out just like old times, Paddy’s gonna watch Eve not that she needs much watching at her age, so what do you say” Chas asked.

“Sounds good, I could do with a night out” Charity smiled would be nice to have a night out.

“Hi Vanessa what can I get you” Chas asked as she walked into the pub.

“I’ll get it” Charity smiled as she looked up.

“I thought you weren’t working today” Chas laughed as Charity poured Vanessa a pint.

“I know what Ness likes don’t get used to this Chas I’m going back to my crossword now” Charity smiled at the face Chas was giving her.

“Is Marlon working today I’m starving” Vanessa smiled as she sipped her drink.

“Yeah I’ll just get him don’t want to take queen bee from her crossword” Chas laughed.

“So how was work” Charity asked as Vanessa sat at the bar.

“I’m not working today, I’ve got a couple of meetings coming up, some of the clients from my old practise want to come over to my clinic here. I’ve been looking for a place to rent all morning I can’t keep staying with Tracy and Nate” Vanessa sighed as Chas handed her a menu.

“You can stay here I still have my room here, Chas wouldn’t mind there’s room and you can do your own thing” Charity suggested hoping she said yes was better than her getting a place away from the village.

“Are you sure that’s ok, I don’t want to impose” Vanessa said would be good to have her own space again.

“Cause it’s ok, right Chas” Charity smiled and went back to her crossword.

“Cause you can love, this one stays over all the time or she did, that sort of stopped when you came home at least you clean up after yourself” Chas laughed.

“Shut up Chas” Charity said as she slapped her on the arm.

“Hi Mum, Ma, Chas can I get a sandwich I’m starving” Moses smiled as she walked through the door.

“Hi Moses you home early” Charity smiled as she hugged her son it’s been weeks since she seen him.

“I’ve missed you too Ma” Moses laughed as she hugged him.

“I swear your mum’s got soppy in her old age” Chas laughed as Charity glared at her.

“What is it pick on Charity day, can’t I just be happy to see my boy, anyway where’s your dad” Charity asked he always popped in to say hello.

“Oh dad had to work so Rebecca dropped me off about ten minutes ago knew you’d be here so after dropping my bag off I came here, didn’t expect to see mum here though what’s going on” Moses asked as he moved to hug his mum next.

“Hi Moses, I’ve missed you” Vanessa smiled as she hugged her son.

“So what’s going on” Moses asked gesturing to his mum’s new closeness.

“Oh we’ve decided to be friends” Charity shrugged like it was no big deal.

“You and mum friends yeah right, that will work” Moses smirked his parents were gonna get back together they weren’t fooling anyone.

“Hey we can be friends why do people keep acting so shocked” Charity sighed.

“Ma, you love mum stop being stupid and just get back together” Moses said they belonged together anyone could see that.

“I’m going out I don’t need this again” Charity yelled as she grabbed her coat and walked out.

“Mum I’m sorry I just think your both idiots this friend’s thing is not going to work” Moses sighed feeling bad about hurting them.

“Moses I just want your mum back in my life and if she needs me to be her friend than that’s what I’ll be, I love her and I know she still loves me she just needs to trust me again” Vanessa sighed as she sat with Moses at the bar.

“She will one day mum once she realises you’re not going anywhere, well I better go I need to get changed I’m meeting Sofie soon I’ll come see you in the morning before school you can treat me to breakfast in the café. Oh and Mum I got a rugby game on Friday if you want to come just don’t mention in to Ma” Moses smiled as he left the pub.

“Charity is never going to live that one down is she” Vanessa smiled as she finished her pint.

“Hi Ma you alright” Johnny asked as he saw her upset.

“Yeah I will be just needed some air, what are you up to anyway, Moses is home” Charity said as she hugged her son.

“Just been in town got a couple of new video games, Moses seeing Sofie tonight I spoke to him earlier. I’m going to a party later if that’s ok with a couple of my friends from Basketball” Johnny asked hoping he could go.

“That’s fine I trust you have you told Emily you like her yet” Charity asked knowing he liked her he could pretend all he wanted but she knew her boy.

“Ma, we’re just friends, we’ve been in each others lives since we were ten she’s more like a sister to me” Johnny sighed as his cheeks started to turn pink.

“Whatever you say Johnny bobs but don’t wait too long to tell her how you feel eventually she’ll meet someone and you’ll regret not telling her how you feel” Charity said as they walked back to the house.

“Maybe you should take your own advise Ma and sort things out with Mum before she moves on too. I know you still love Mum it’s time to stop running I don’t like to see you hurting and this friends situation is never going to work and you know that, Ma I’ll see you later ok, love you” Johnny smiled as he kissed her cheek.

“Love you too” Charity sighed she wanted to trust Vanessa she truly did but she was still to hurt and angry the night out with Chas couldn’t come sooner she really needed to clear her head and have some fun.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

When Charity and Chas arrived at the restaurant, they were shocked to see Vanessa there with some woman. She never said she was going out not that she needed to they’re not together anymore.

“What are you doing” Charity asked as Chas started to walk over to them.

“I’m going to find out what she doing here, now come on” Chas said as she took Charity’s arm.

“No Chas no I don’t want to what she does is up to her” Charity said as she tried to take her arm back.

“Charity come on” Chas said as she forced her cousin over to them.

“Hi” Charity broke out when she approached the table.

“Hi Charity, Chas what a surprise” Vanessa broke out not expecting to see them there.

“Yeah I bet it is so who’s your friend” Chas smirked at the lady eating dinner with her cousins wife the cheek of this and here she was trying to help Vanessa.

“Oh I’m sorry, Cathy this is a good friend of mine Charity Dingle and her cousin Chas. Cathy wants to invest in the practice” Vanessa said still in shock and not really knowing what to say.

“Nice to meet you ladies” Cathy smiled as she offered her hand out for them to shake.

“Nice to meet you too, look our tables ready we’ve got to go, enjoy the rest of your evening” Charity said as they walked away.

“False alarm she’s just a business associate” Chas smiled she could tell Charity was pissed off.

“Did you hear how she introduced me” Charity gritted she wanted to storm over there and do something but she didn’t want to cause a scene.

“Sorry can’t say I noticed” Chas said as she started to read the menu.

“Her good friend, a friend Chas I’m her bloody wife, we have kids and I’m demoted to just her bloody friend” Charity yelled.

“Charity what could she say oh hi this is my estranged wife, but we’re just friends now. You’re the one who wanted to be friends with her you can’t get pissed off because that’s how she introduces you” Chas said as she poured herself a glass of wine.

“Shut up Chas, and why did you have to drag me over there anyway” Charity yelled.

“Because I wanted to know who she was with and so did you” Chas said Charity could deny it all she wanted but she wanted to know.

“She still should have told me, look I don’t wanna talk about this all night” Charity sighed as she took a sip of wine.

“Look Charity if you still love her forgive her so you can get on with your lives and be happy again” Chas tried talking some sense into her stubborn cousin.

“I don’t think I could do that Chas I’m just not ready she hurt me too much” Charity sighed as she looked at the love her life on what looked like a date with another woman.

The next morning Vanessa went over to see Charity they’re meant to be driving to Johnny’s basketball game together.

“Hi Charity, you ready to go” Vanessa asked as she opened the door.

“Are you kidding me” Charity sighed she was still pissed about last night.

“Have I done something wrong” Vanessa asked she was so confused she thought things were getting better with Charity.

“Nope, you’ve done nothing at all” Charity said as she put her coat on.

“Charity is this about last night Cathy is a client it wasn’t a date” Vanessa sighed she knew Charity was mad and jealous she could tell.

“You don’t have to explain yourself to me Ness after all I’m just your good friend and your free to do whatever you want” Charity said as she walked out.

“You’re being ridiculous, your acting like it was a date, so are you coming to the game” Vanessa yelled as Charity was walking up the path.

“I can’t believe you’re going to stand there and act like you don’t remember introducing me to your date as your good friend,” Charity yelled as shew threw her bag in the backseat.

“First of all it wasn’t a date it was a business meeting and second of all we are friends which was your idea. What could I say oh this is my estranged wife who doesn’t want to be with me anymore” Vanessa yelled.

“Look you can date whoever you like I don’t care, I’ll meet you there ok. I’ve got to go into town afterwards anyway” Charity said as she got in her car she knew she was being a bitch but she was hurt and didn’t want to be around her to say something she couldn’t take back.

Vanessa wanted to sit with Charity at Johnny’s match but she couldn’t not with how things were this morning. She couldn’t understand why Charity over reacted she hadn’t done anything wrong.

“Hi Mum, can you give me a lift, Ma’s got to go into town” Johnny smiled as he approached his mum.

“Sure good game, Johnny” Vanessa smiled as she hugged her son.

“So what happened with Ma I noticed you weren’t sitting together” Jonny asked confused he thought they were getting on again.

After telling Johnny what happened she was shocked when he started laughing.

“It’s not funny Johnny” Vanessa sighed as they got in the car.

“Mum you introduced Ma as your friend no wonder she’s pissed how would you feel if she did the same to you, look I’m sorry for laughing was just a shock and I could imagine Ma’s face when you said that” Johnny smiled as they were driving home.

“Ok I see your point I’ll phone your mum later and apologise, do you want to grab something to eat on the way home” Vanessa asked knowing him he’d want McDonalds or something.

“Sure sounds good, thanks Mum” Johnny smiled as he turned the radio on.

Charity didn’t mean to just leave Johnny at his game but she had to leave, and she really did need to go into Hotten get a few things and she was still too angry to be around Vanessa. Chas was right she needed to talk to her and tell her how she’s feeling without yelling she just doesn’t think she’s ready for that. When Charity got home she noticed she had a missed call from Vanessa so she decided to listen to the voicemail.

“Charity I’m sorry for introducing you as my friend. I did that because that’s what you said you wanted us to be, the truth is I don’t only wanna be your friend. I want you to be my wife again I want us to be a family again. But if that’s not something that you want then I think we both need to move on and live our lives we can’t keep hurting like this it’s not fair on you or me.” Vanessa said as she left a message on Charity’s voicemail.

It broke Charity’s heart hearing those words from Vanessa because if she was truly being honest she didn’t want to move on she wanted them to be like they was before happy and a family. Charity did want Vanessa to be happy even if it’s not with her she knew she had to let her go because this wasn’t healthy they couldn’t keep hurting each other.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

It’s been a couple of days now since Vanessa left the voice mail, Charity’s decided to give her some space so she’s been avoiding her as much as she could she knew she was being childish but she really didn’t know what to do anymore.

“Morning Ma” Johnny said as she came down the stairs.

“Morning Johnny bobs I thought you was staying with your mum at the pub” Charity asked shocked to see him home.

“Oh I went to Michael’s he was having a party I didn’t get back till late so came home instead” Johnny said as he put the kettle on.

“Oh ok was Moz with you or is he with Mum” Charity asked she trust her boys they were good kids.

“No he had a date with Sofie he’ll be at the pub” Jonny said as he made ma a cup of tea.

“Things are going well with Sofie, I’m still yet to meet her doesn’t sit right with me anyway you told Emily how you feel about her yet” Charity smiled as he handed her the tea.

“Bye Ma I’m going for a shower” Johnny said as he shook his head at her they were just friends.

“One day Johnny bobs you’re going to marry that girl” Charity laughed as he went up the stairs she loved teasing him she knew he had feelings for her they were inseparable.

When Vanessa went downstairs, she was shocked not to see Johnny with Moses she went to sleep quite early as she had an early start the day before.

“Morning Mum” Moses said as he saw her walk into the front room.

“Morning where’s Johnny” Vanessa asked needing to know.

“Oh he’s at home, he went to a friend’s house and it got late so he went home he said to tell you he’ll see you later” Moses said as he finished eating his cereal.

“Ok, at least he’s safe, so what you up to today” Vanessa asked as she sat next to him at the table.

“I’m going home soon going to go play Xbox with Johnny I feel like we haven’t spent any time together lately, how’s things with Ma” Moses asked hoping they were talking again.

“No change she’s been avoiding me for the last few days I guess she’s really ready to move on, I’m going to work call me if you need anything” Vanessa said as she hugged her son.

Everyone could see they belonged together they were just being stupid now Tracy knew she had to do something she felt partly to blame for telling Charity, Vanessa had moved on when she hadn’t.

“How’s my favourite boys” Tracy asked as she approached Johnny and Moses.

“What do you want Tracy” Johnny asked knowing his aunt she wanted them to do something.

“Nothing gets past you does it, fine, I’ll just tell you. I want to get your mum’s back together they just being stupid now and I’m tired of them being apart, but if you don’t want to help” Tracy said as she started walking away.

“Ok we’ll help but if they find out this was all on you” Johnny said wanting his parents to get back together.

“Awesome so I spoke to Chas and everything is set up we just have to get your mum’s there” Tracy smiled hoping her sister wouldn’t kill her for doing this.

“Hi Mum can you come meet me in the pub there’s something wrong with Moses he’s stuck in the cellar I tried calling Ma her phone not working” Johnny lied as he spoke to his mum on the phone.

“Johnny I said to get your mum there not scare her half to death” Tracy said as they sat in the pub.

“What it’s the only thing I could think of she knows about the dodgy lock she’s been locked down there enough times” Johnny shrugged his shoulders not seeing an issue in what he said.

“Now your brother needs to get Charity here and then everything will be perfect” Tracy smiled this had to work. 

Vanessa rushed out of the practice scared something had happened to her son and also wondering where Charity was she hadn’t been in the pub for days.

“Come on Ma you’ve got to come” Moses said as he dragged his mum through the back door of the pub.

“What in the hell is going on why are you dragging me into the pub I’m not working today” Charity huffed she was enjoying her crossword when he came home and demanded she go to the pub.

“Ma I told you Johnny stuck in the cellar, you’ve been stuck down there enough to know how to get him out” Moses said this had to work he really hoped he wouldn’t be grounded because of Tracy’s idea.

“Ok, it really only locks from the inside though so you could have opened it” Charity said as she opened the door easily he really could have done this himself.

“Thanks Ma, don’t kill me” Moses said as he locked the door on his mum.

“Moses what are you doing open the door right now” Charity yelled he was in so much trouble when she got out.

Moses quickly dropped the key and ran upstairs before his mum came not wanting to ruin the plan. Charity realised yelling was no use something was clearly going on so she walked down the stairs and was surprised to see a table set for two what in the hell was going on.

“Moses you ok” Vanessa asked as she opened the door.

“Ness what is going on” Charity asked was this her idea.

“Charity what are you doing here what is all this” Vanessa asked confused.

“I think we’ve been set up please say you left the door open” Charity asked as she rushed back upstairs to find the door locked.

“Ma, you both staying in there until you sort this stupid mess out” Johnny yelled through the door.

“You boys are so grounded and I know you had help they’re in trouble too” Charity yelled as she made her way back down the stairs.

“You got to admit is kind of sweet, although they didn’t have to scare me to death I really thought something had happened, shall we” Vanessa said as she sat down.

“Oh what the hell but I’m still angry at them” Charity said as she reluctantly sat down.

“This smells amazing I still can’t believe they done this for us” Vanessa smiled as she poured them both some wine.

“I can’t believe you’re not pissed off about this we’ve been set up” Charity said as she took a gulp of wine.

“Charity I know this is hard for you, to be here with me after what happened but I love you I would like us to be a family, I want to be your wife again and I know I’ve given you reason to doubt us. I know I hurt you when I left but I swear to you I’ll never leave you again” Vanessa cried as she reached for her hand.

“Vanessa don’t make promises you can’t keep, how can I trust you how can I be shore I’m really who you want” Charity cried as she got up this was just too much.

“Because I love you my beautiful wife, from that moment right here in the cellar I knew you were the one for me. You were so tough, stubborn, and you drove me crazy. My wife see she’s a woman you don’t want to mess with, but she’s got this massive heart which she rarely lets people see, she loves deeply and passionately. In fact sometimes it comes at you so fast you don’t think you disserve it. She loves her kids and boy they love her back just as much. My wife is the most beautiful, sexiest woman I’ve ever laid my eyes on, from the moment you finally agreed to go out with me I’ve never been happier. We were so crazy in love and when you asked me to be your wife, that was the moment I knew I could never live without you. You gave me our family, you gave me you for the last 12 years. You are my everything Charity and I know I hurt you, I’m going to spend the rest of my life making that up to you but I can’t be without you this past year has been hell for me. So if you can find it in you to try and make this work I’m waiting, I’ll wait forever to be your wife again” Vanessa cried as she knelt in front of Charity. 

“Yes I want to be your wife again, how long have you been working on that speech” Charity asked as she wiped the tears from Vanessa’s face.

“Oh since the day we got together” Vanessa smiled as she kissed her wife this is where she belonged she was never going to lose her again.

“Do you think they’re ok down there” Moses asked they had been down there about an hour now.

“They’ll be fine, Ma not banging on the door, Trace I think your plan has worked” Johnny smiled.

“Well we best open the door and when they ready to come out they can” Moses said as he unlocked the door.

“Do you want to go play Xbox now they’re going to be down there for ages” Johnny asked their work here was done and he really didn’t feel like getting in trouble for locking them in there.

“So does this mean we’re back together” Vanessa smiled as she reluctantly moved her lips away from Charity.

“Yes but I don’t think we should tell them upstairs just yet I want to keep you all to myself for now and we can call it payback for setting this up” Charity smiled as she held her in her arms.

“Ok, sneaking around could be fun, I guess we better go back upstairs” Vanessa smiled as they smoothed out there clothes.

“Ok I’ll kiss you later” Charity smiled as they headed out of the cellar.

“So you two back together or what” Tracy asked as they made their way into the pub.

“No, is that what your little plan was, we’ve talked things out and we’ve decided to move on, and just remain friends” Charity said as she shrugged her shoulders.

“What, you can’t be ok with this Vee” Tracy said in shock.

“It’s what Charity wants and I want her to be happy” Vanessa smiled.

“You’ve got to be kidding me I give up, you’re a pair of idiots” Tracy huffed as she walked out of the pub.

“Your sister needs a new hobby oh and Chas you’re cleaning the mess down there I know you were in on it as well” Charity smiled as she left the pub.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

They’ve been sneaking around all week it’s been fun it’s just like when they first got together Charity did feel a little bit bad about keeping it from the boys but she wasn’t ready to tell anyone yet.

“Paddy I swear I heard Vanessa talking to someone in the early hours something is going on and I heard the door go early this morning I think she’s seeing someone” Chas said as she handed Paddy a cup of tea.

“Chas, Ness loves Charity she’s not seeing someone else maybe she was on the phone who knows let’s not let our minds run away with things” Paddy said he knew Vanessa she wouldn’t cheat.

“I know what I heard and I’m going to get to the bottom of this” Chas sighed she didn’t want her cousin to hurt anymore.

“Morning Chas, Paddy I’ll see you later I’m just going into town,” Vanessa said as she left the pub.

“Ok bye Ness” Paddy said as he continued eating his breakfast.

Charity was exhausted she was nearly caught this morning by Chas sneaking out of the pub, they really needed to come up with another plan to spend time together. She was in need of a strong coffee.

“Hi Charity what you doing this morning” Vanessa asked as Charity answered the phone.

“Hi babe I’m just going to the Café then I’ve got my shift this afternoon I can’t wait to see you” Charity smiled as she made her way to the café.

“I’m not doing anything this morning I’ll come meet you in the Café I’ll be there in about 20 minutes love you” Vanessa smiled as she got back in her car.

“See you soon, love you too” Charity smiled as she hung up the phone.

“You love who” Tracy asked catching the end of the conversation.

“It’s no one Trace do you always listen in on people’s conversations,” Charity asked in shock not expecting to see Tracy standing there.

“Are you seeing someone” Tracy asked in shock this was really going to hurt Vanessa.

“Don’t be ridiculous, look I’ve got to go I’m meeting someone in the café” Charity said as she continued walking she really needed to be more careful.

Tracy knew she needed answers she figured Chas would know so she headed to the pub. Something was going on and she was going to find out what it was.

“Hi Trace what can I get ya, we’re not open yet” Chas asked as she opened the door.

“Chas do you think Charity seeing someone I heard her being all lovey on the phone” Tracy asked cutting straight to it.

“Really I was going to ask you if you though Ness was seeing someone I heard her talking to someone last night and I heard the door go early this morning Paddy said I was being ridiculous” Chas said something was going on.

“Maybe they really are ready to move on, I always thought they’d get back together. I think Charity has a date with someone in the café the boys are going to be gutted” Tracy said as Chas poured her a drink.

“I think they’re head need knocking together I swear they’re both stubborn idiots, can’t be a long date she’s working this afternoon” Chas said as she finished getting the bar ready.

“Chas I’ll see you later, thanks for the drink” Tracy said as she left she really wished she could do something more she still felt partly to blame for them breaking up.

“Hi Ness, I bought you a coffee” Charity smiled as Vanessa sat down next to her.

“Thanks Charity, so I was thinking as the boys are going to be staying at the pub something about some new game Paddy bought I thought we could book a hotel for the night it would give us some alone time without having to run around worrying about being caught” Vanessa said as she took sip of coffee.

“Sound amazing I think Tracy thinks I’m seeing someone she overheard the end of our conversation earlier,” Charity said feeling bad about lying.

“Maybe it’s time we tell everyone I want people to know we’re back together,” Vanessa said while it’s been fun they were too old to be playing games.

“Ok tomorrow we’ll tell everyone let’s just have one last night just us” Charity smiled as she held Vanessa in her arms.

“Good your both here, look its clear to everyone you both still love each other so stop playing around and get it together ok” Tracy said happy they were both here she was sick of them being apart now.

“Shall we” Vanessa, asked as Charity smiled and kissed her.

“Damn I’m good I should have just done that months ago we could have saved ourselves all that trouble, now don’t break up again” Tracy smiled as she left them to it.

“Everyone will know now” Vanessa smiled as Charity held her.

“Saves us doing it, I also wanted to kiss you the moment you walked in here, now your sister can think she had a hand in us getting back together. Do you want to come with us to the pub I’ve got to start my shift soon” Charity asked as she finished her coffee she felt better now that her headache had gone.

“Sounds good, let’s go” Vanessa smiled as she took Charity’s hand and they walked over to the pub.

“Hi Ness, Charity you’re here early what’s going on” Chas asked in shock at seeing them both together.

“Oh that I figured I’d come in early, oh and Ness and I are back together thought I’d let you know” Charity smiled as she poured her and Vanessa a drink.

“Oh so you’re the woman she was talking to last night and sneaking out this morning I knew I heard something,” Chas said happy for them.

“Yep sorry about that we wouldn’t to keep it between us for a while, oh and that reminds me Ness I need to ring the lawyer to stop our divorce,” Charity said as she took her phone out.

“Charity you haven’t done that yet” Vanessa asked in shock.

“Babe been sort of busy I forgot but it’s ok they can’t finalise it without us there surly and if they have we’ll just have to get remarried” Charity said as she started dialling the number.

“Charity would you like us to get married again,” Vanessa asked.

“Well if we have to but not really babe I’ve been married enough times, ours is the longest marriage though, that’s because I love you more than I’ve ever loved anyone else. If you want us to get married again then I will. Our wedding last time was perfect for me I wouldn’t change a thing about that day” Charity said as Vanessa wrapped her arms around her waist.

“Our wedding was perfect you’re the love of my life too Charity let’s hope we can stop this divorce” Vanessa said as she kissed her.

“Hello Mrs Dingle I haven’t heard from you in a while your hearing to finalise your divorce is next week,” Mr Jones said as he answered the phone.

“Oh is there a way to cancel it my wife and I are black together we don’t want to divorce anymore” Charity said hoping it wasn’t too late.

“I’m happy for you Mrs Dingle I’ll cancel it straight away I hope you and your wife will be happy together I’ll send you the final bill” Mr Jones said as she hung up the phone.

“So good news he’s going to cancel it but its going to cost me around a grand” Charity said she felt like she wasted her money she should have known they’d get back together.

“So we’re not getting divorced I can’t tell you how happy I am I love you Charity I’m never letting you go ever again and hey its only money” Vanessa smiled as she kissed her.


End file.
